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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25858828">Bones can be Humerus</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/slytherinenigma/pseuds/slytherinenigma'>slytherinenigma</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Bellamione Coven's August Event 2020, Discord: Bellamione Coven, F/F</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:55:12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>908</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25858828</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/slytherinenigma/pseuds/slytherinenigma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Group B for the prompt 'I'm gonna start removing my bones whenever they hurt'</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hermione Granger/Bellatrix Black Lestrange</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>69</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Bones can be Humerus</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“What do you mean I need to come to St Mungo's to collect my wife?” Hermione was irate as the call was transferred straight into her office from her assistant.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She broke her wrist how? . . Quidditch?!” Hermione slammed the phone down gathering up her cloak and wand before storming through her floo port.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bellatrix sat with a bored expression on her face, her sister was already present muttering about the inconvenience of being summoned from her flower arranging committee. </span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“The next Dragon Flame Orchid is not due to bloom for another 15 years! The first Orchid to bloom in 23 years! I timed to the perfect moment and missed because you're still trying to be competitive with a bloody Weasley!” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The door burst open. Bella hoping it was a healer to tell them they could leave was both happy and disappointed as her wife marched through the door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What happened?” She demanded. A worried look in her eye as she went straight to her wife currently sitting on the hospital bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Broken wrist they reckon, just waiting for the Healer to return and hopefully say I can go home and be relieved of the torture of dear Cissy bitching about her bloody orchid still.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Narcissa Glared. “23 years I nurtured that Orchid! I hope Hermione confiscates your broom!” Narcissa promptly stood up gathering her things, a death stare at her sister before nodding to Hermione and marching out the door. </span>
  <span><br/>
<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bellatrix chuckled at her dramatic sister, however seeing the stern look on Hermione's face. She stopped and her face turned sheepish as she pleaded. “Please don't take my broom love.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I should take your broom, what even happened?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Weasley challenged me, I may have over judged my shot, but I won, that's the main thing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ugh even after all these years you're both still acting like rivals” She rubbed her temple in frustration.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The door opened as the healer slipped in, both witches turning their attention to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just a small dose of Skele-Gro needed Ms Black and you’ll be right as rain”</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“Skele-gro?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes Ms Black, you shattered the scaphoid pretty much to smithereens” He explained as he handed her a potion to swallow. Bellatrix took the bottle, her nose wrinkling in disgust as she got a whiff before downing the liquid in one loud gulp.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They had returned home later that afternoon, Bella’s adrenaline had worn off and as the swelling on the wrist was evident, Vocalising her discomfort as they later sat down to rest and watch TV.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ow” Bellatrix grumbled once again, the twinging ache evident as her wrist continued to throb.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well that will teach you to stop being so competitive and more careful in sports.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bellatrix huffed and ignored Hermione’s lecture. “I'm gonna remove my bones whenever they hurt in future.” missing the smile on Hermione's face as the dark witch continued to mutter to herself.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>****</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hermione sighed as she watched the gracious looking Eurasian Owl leave her office. Grasping the familiar sealed letter in her hand. A note to her in the office from Narcissa was becoming all too familiar, she knew it would mean nothing good. She ripped at the seal and unfolded the pristine parchment. </span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <em>
    <span>Please locate your wife and get her Ego in check. From what Andy has just informed me, Her and Weasley are currently in competition to go wild Chimera Racing.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The assistant nearly jumped out of her chair as she heard a large curse of obscenities before the sound of the floo activating informed her Hermione had left the office in a hurry.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hermione entered into her homestead like a hurricane. A brief stop at St Mungos informed her Bella had not been admitted. A bombardment at the Burrow and a large barrating argument with Ron who was caressing some nasty cuts on his leg for their stupidity was enough to be informed that Wild Chimera racing had taken place with consequences and Bellatrix had gone home.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“BELLA!” Hermione shouted through the hall as she pulled off her cloak and shoes. Slight relief as she heard her wife call back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“In the kitchen pet.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hermione walked in relieved as she saw her dark witch over by the stove making a hot drink with her back towards her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank Merlin. I got Narcissa’s note and saw Ron at the burrow an- WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT ON MY TABLE!?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bellatrix spun round to see the horrified look on Hermione's face as she stared at the Bone floating above the table.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh that,” she replied, still stirring her cup “it's just my arm bone,” She shrugged.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just YOUR arm bone?” Hemione cried in disbelief.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bellatrix nodded. It was only then Hermione noticed how the dark witches' left arm seemed to be hanging, bouncing slightly at the side almost rubbery.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I took it out while the skele gro works its magic. No pain!” Bella smiled excitedly at the last statement. Hermione facepalmed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is this even sanitary?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course. I’m not stupid love. I put sterilizing charms on it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bellatrix now walked across holding the cup in her functioning side, handing the cup to her wife. The smell of Chamomile distracted Hermione for a moment, calming her as she became more rational about the situation.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, Wild chimera Racing. Did you win?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“HA! Of course! Weasley couldn't even catch one!” Bellatrix laughed a gleam of triumph in her dark eyes as she told her wife about the days shenanigans.</span>
  <span><br/>
<br/>
</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
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